Honesty

I'm writing about something I've written about a LOT lately. Rachael's speech delay. I seriously cannot tell you how many emotions I have on this subject, all of them negative. I truly, truly, feel like a terrible mom on a daily basis. Not because she isn't talking, but because I feel like I can't try any longer. It is so frustrating to want to play a game with your child only to have both of you get so frustrated that mom ends up in tears and the kid wonders what is going on and starts bringing mom tissues (so sweet, by the way). I want to teach colors, shapes, have her sing songs with me, but I can only take so much of her saying, "Wah" every time I ask her a question. Nate and I have stopped asking her what everything is. I've decided to put a halt on my potty training efforts. Its terrible, but I think, "What's the point? She's not going to do it." (Bad mom feelings again.) Interactive reading, singing songs, asking questions, none of these things do anything other than make me frustrated and emotional. We're going to stop asking and hope that she stops feeling pressure and just talks. And people telling me stories about how their niece/nephew, son/daughter, Einstein didn't talk until they were four really don't make me feel any better. These feelings are truly absorbing my life. I can't focus on the joy of being pregnant, preparing for the baby, on moving, on anything other than my frustration.

Big Foot

Cedar City has been having some bad weather lately, snow, rain, basically just precipitation. Well the other night at around 4 a.m. we were awoken by a steady "drip" on Nate's side of the bed. Yes, my friends, our ceiling was leaking. So annoying. But, on the bright side, we're organizing our room and rearranging it to prep for the baby (anyone have a glider they're not using?). Well I happened to find this little paper in my journey through all of our crap. Rachael has always had big feet. Seriously, when she was first born her feet looked totally out of proportion to the rest of her tiny body. Now just look at her gargantuan feet. Crazy! (And her toes don't really curl under like that, thank goodness. She has long straight toes, all ten of them, perfect to slip into a pair of pointe shoes one day. If she wants to...) She currently has feet the same size as her 4 year old cousin, but its ok since she's wearing the same size clothes to match. (But he's small for his age...)

Skype

This was Rachael's first experience Skyping with my mom a few weeks ago. She. Loved. It. Seriously, I'm obsessed with this video. They played peek-a-boo and Rachael even throws in a little hair grabbing action just to make us laugh. Go ahead, laugh out loud, you know you want to.

(Note: While I think Skype is a great way for family members (i.e. grandparents/aunts) to keep in contact with little children, I find it slightly awkward. I have to make sure my kitchen is clean and my make up is on... No bueno. So unless you're a grandparent/aunt, I'll be honest, I'd rather not Skype with you unless you live in a foreign country and phone calls are not possible. Sorry, but that's the truth.)

Disneyland!!

Here is the whole gang!! This piture turned out pretty darn well if you ask me :) Great job, kind stranger who took this picture!!

Here is our little family. Rachael had a blast and we're so excited to take her again when we live (literally) 20 minutes away from Disneyland!!

Seeing as how this might be the only time I'll post, I just collaged all of our pictures, feel free to peruse.
(Ok, ok, chances of this being my only time posting aren't good, I need to document these memories. Its just Rachael is taking a nap which NEVER happens and I would love a nap, too)

Mickey and Princesses

I was so so SO excited for Rachael to meet the characters! But, seeing as how Rach doesn't exactly understand the whole "line" concept, I decided to keep that to a minimum, focusing only on princesses and Mickey Mouse (or "Mnah" as Rachael so affectionately calls him). She didn't scream and try to wriggle out of my arms when we went to see Mickey, but this is the only shot we got. What can you do? The princesses was a different story. Disneyland has an area dedicated to the princesses. They open at 10:30 and you wait in line to meet three at a time, you don't know which ones until you get there. Nice-ish, but the line was still long, but we did it. Waited about 30 minutes only to have Rachael have a complete panic attack as we were walking up to Cinderella. Prince Charming took off when he saw us coming. Ugh. These pictures are funny though. I was very pleased with her reaction to Tiana though. They have a Jamboree every hour when Tiana comes out to meet the kids by the river and we were like 4th in line. They gave us some Mardi Gras beads and Rachael actually looked at her and we almost got a smile out of her.

*Side note* Rachael has never seen the movies Cinderella, Snow White, or Sleeping Beauty, but has seen The Princess and the Frog countless times. She and Tiana were best friends before they even met

Rachael and Daddy

I was just uploading some videos from our video camera's memory chip and came across these from the day Rachael was born. (I know, that was over 2.5 years ago, but I get scared to erase any videos in case I lose them forever! An external hard drive specifically for pictures and videos is on our list of things to get.) This is when Rachael is brand new, like 10 minutes old, and I love this video of her and Nate. He is glowing, and it gets me all emotional. I loved every second of this day (even when I was panicking). I'll do a blog post on the birth story soon because I wasn't a blogger then, and I need to document these things, especially because I have another birth story coming up.